change

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i waited so long for the leaves to change. this is the sugar maple tree in my front yard, silhouetted against one hell of beautiful day. it is barely changing, as the summer weather continues to hold through early november. i can tell my trees are resistant to their autumnal changes. they are hanging on to summer.

i too always hang onto summer. i too am resistant to change. like the maples, i’m half-in half-out. i can feel the changes coming in and trickling down from above. i know the time has come. yet my core still hangs on to the old me, the me i’ve known all summer, the me with green leaves. green leaves are not appropriate for the winter months. we both know this, but we are waiting until the last minute to let them go.

when the leaves come back next summer, they are not the same leaves as they were the last summer. they are new, better adapted to ever changing environment, produced for the immediate here and now. they are present. i too hope to shed some baggage that no longer serves me. i too hope to adapt season by season to the changes in my environment. i too hope to grow into new parts of myself, my very present self.

 

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